Don't Let Me Forget

I was sitting at my desk at work this morning, eating my Egg McMuffin and looking at the morning paper before I started my day. I had my heater on at my feet and I was very warm and toasty. All of a sudden my eyes landed on a picture in the paper of a Haitian woman who had been pulled out of the earthquake rubble after 43 hours of being buried alive. There were rescue workers and others smiling all around her. She had both arms held high in the air. I'm pretty sure she was thinking, "I'm alive!" No, on the other hand I cannot imagine what she was thinking. Nor can I imagine what she had been thinking during the prior 43 hours as she lay helpless under the rubble. What was she thinking? Can you imagine?

What struck me the most was the expression on the face of the woman beside her who was holding on to her. I'm not sure if she was a relative, but by the look of relief and joy that was evident on her face, she must have loved this rescued woman. I started to take another bite of my sandwich and suddenly my mind was flooded with the thought of, my God.....how must that feel? I tried to mentally picture me frantically searching for days for one of my loved ones , praying and holding on to hope for them, then finding them, digging with all my might to get them out, praying, begging, screaming for God to show mercy and finally the knowledge that they were miraculously alive. Against all odds....alive. Imagine it for yourself. What must that feel like?

Before I could get a hold of myself, one of my co-workers came into my office and asked me why I was crying. I showed her the picture. I asked, "Can you imagine?" As tears filled her eyes, she softly answered, "No. No I can't." Another co-worker came in and we shared the story with her. There were very few words exchanged, just a silent understanding of how blessed we are. So blessed. To the point of being ashamed, we are blessed.

I couldn't finish my Egg McMuffin. I had lost my appetite. Oh, it will come back, you can bet on that. In a few hours I'm sure I will be thinking what my next meal will be. You see, I rarely miss a meal. Oh, I've fasted meals before, but always with the knowledge that food was just around the corner. I am so comfortable. I'm surely not going to deprive myself but for so long, never have. Last week we didn't have heat in the school for a couple of days and you would have thought that my world had come to an end. Sitting there with my new Christmas coat on, my $30 gloves, my designer ear muffs, with my cold lips poked out. Drinking my coffeehouse coffee and eating my fast food sandwich. With my lips poked out.

I am so comfortable.

I cut that picture out and put it in my daily calendar. I don't want to forget it. Like I always do. I cry a little bit over the devastation and then I forget it. It doesn't change me. I want it to change me. God help me to change. Not just cry over the sadness and then forget it. Do all that You can to help me remember it. I want to be the change that helps to make the difference. I want that more than I have ever wanted anything in my life.